Lost in Translation

For speaking the language, there are times that I am really lost in a conversation. By pronouncing TH as a singular T sound, the letter Z pronounced Zed, the letter H as Haych, talking fast, throwing in a random Irish Gaelic word, and with all the slurring at the pubs, there are times I have no idea what was just said. I do the old “smile and nod”.

Familiar words but different meanings:
Solicitor = Lawyer
Redundant = Unemployed
Public School = Private School
State School = Public School
Fag = Cigarette
Dear = Expensive
Dummy = Pacifier
Skip = Dumpster
Bonnet = Hood of car
Boot = Trunk of car
Fanny = A woman’s private parts (So do not say Fanny Pack here, or you may be slapped)
Pants = Underware ( I have insulated a 3 year old with this when I told him to be careful rolling down the Hills of Tara that was covered in sheep poo since he was getting his pants all dirty. He gave me the you must be crazy look and promptly told me that he is potty trained)

Random names for familiar things:
Aubergine = Eggplant
Courgette = Zucchini
Advert = Commercial
Nappies = Diapers
Queue = Line (like what you stand in)
Hoover = Vacuum cleaner
Lorry = Truck
Snog = Makeout type kiss
Fairy Cake = Cupcake
Dungarees = Overalls
Knickers = Panties
Brolly = Umbrella
Wellies = Rain boots
Mackintosh = Raincoat
Spelt = Spelled
Ladybird = Ladybug
Loo = Bathroom
The Maenopause = Menopause (as if there was some other kind)
Green Gilbert = Booger (When I asked a small child if he was digging for gold, he looked at me and said he was just getting rid of his green Gilberts – this came from an old British 80s Saturday Morning Show)

At least with the added U in places: Mold – Mould, color – colour, favorite – favourite or an added O in places: foetal - fetal, it just makes it hard to spell, but said the same. Aluminum and process are spelled the same, but sound different. Ask a Canadian how to say those words. Schedule is also spelled the same but pronounce “Shed-you-ull”. These are just the few that I have run into since I came here. I also am not including random slang for stuff (that can be for another post all together). I am sure there are more, but just thought I would share my English lessons.